Alright baby girl, lets sing to it
You're getting your degree, you're going to college
I'm making music and hoping that Kanye puts me on
But If I don't make it baby, will you be mad at me
If I just chilled at home as your stay-home-daddy?
Come on, I'll make you coffee (coffee), and a bagel (bagel),
and another bagel (2
bagels)
Keep on reading that paper, then its off you go
Hun your gonna be late, don't forget your briefcase, drive
safe, peace babe
Wake up the kids, toast the toast, put the raisin bread up
in the bowl
The toast. did I forget the toast? The toast is toast,
damnit I burnt the toast
Start crying, the kid's like Dad what's wrong? Oh its not
you kids.
Its just me I'm alone. Dad's a little bit stressed. Oh FUCK!
Feeling so sensitive, Im going for a latte, see whats
popping at Pilate's
Hit up my friends like yo what up man, you trying to have a
spa date?
The fuck? Your a stay at home dad... that's not gay!
Ay, ay, ay, ay, you go to work, I mow the lawn
Ay, ay, ay, ay, you make the cheese Ill bring the guac
(Nacho Sauce, Spanish)
Ay, ay, ay, ay, you buy the clothes, I'll take them off (?)
Ay, ay, ay, ay, I'm a stay at home dad, this is my job
You go girl, get that promotion
Ill be on the sofa, collecting unemployment
Yelling at the tv, watching Mory Povich
Who is this Shelly Jones bitch?
Shit is 4 o'clock, time for Oprah (Oprah)
Gospel loves the lord for that
Who stay at home even though we can't get boners
But still Ill trade that for your lane cooking lasagna
Swoopin up the kids from soccer practice (soccer practice)
Then time for gymnastics, rice crispy treats and wax baggies
I'm with my kids in the mini-van, listening to MPR
With the windows down, through the (?)
Then its homework time, dinner time, set the placemats
Cut clean, tuck the rugs, rafts and blankets
Then I lay you down
pop two cialis
, put on stain and then go quench my palette
Is that douche, or does your
cootch
just smell like flowers?
Your feet are calloused, peppermint towlette
Jasmine pedicure? Sented oil, a perfect backrub?
I am Aladin, your carpet is magic, your wish is magic
I would just love to ride your carpet out of the palace
Now keep on bringing the green baby, and Ill keep on tossin'
salad
Ladies and gentlemen, we have been, conditioned to believe,
we must fit in a role?
Brainwashed by (?), depicting our role must match our
genitalia, hail to the no
Its men who go to work, and women raise the children, but I
know the hardest job
is maintaining the household
So I am doing a back to back, no tradebacks, with this
briefcase, for 2010, I am
staying at home
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